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October 8, 2007

Schadenfreude 31 (A Continuing Series)

Updated again (with words)!



















Mike Puma, New York Post:
Death, taxes, Derek Jeter producing in the postseason. You can remove the last component from that list.

Jeter disappeared for the AL Division Series ... The Yankees captain had two singles in last night's 6-4 loss to the Indians in Game 4 of the ALDS, but finished the series 3-for-17 (.176) with no homers and one RBI. ...

Jeter's last chance to make a big contribution came in the sixth inning last night after the Yankees had cut Cleveland's lead to 6-2 and put runners on first and third with one out. With the Stadium buzzing, Jeter hit into a double play, all but pouring a bucket of cold water on the season.

Only adding to Jeter's offensive woes, he did not walk in the series and struck out four times. Over the final two games he hit into three double plays.

There was no such heroic moment for Jeter in this series. He was an October mess, as were the Yankees.
Joel Sherman, New York Post:
... by the ninth inning last night, many seats at a quiet Yankee Stadium were empty, as if a new reality had overwhelmed the old; the mystique and aura giving way to frustration and recriminations. No more champagne, just pagne.

"We earned the right to go home," Cashman said.

73 comments:

  1. I love the smell of schadenfreude in the morning, it smells, like YANKEESS LOST!!!

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  2. SoSHers bringin' the haiku:

    OilCanShotTupac:

    Ultimatum George
    Could not rally his proud Yanks
    Joe picks nose at home

    Chien Ming Wang could not
    Pitch better than a crippled
    blind leper gay nun

    visalia oak:

    Sizemore hit a bomb
    ARod meaningless homer
    Buh-bye Joe Torre

    Clemens spit the bit
    Two hands clutched around their throats
    Cy Wang pitched like shit

    RedOctober3829:

    Jeter hits into DPs
    A-Rod sucks the monkey yet again
    Wait 'till next year

    Mourning Woodward Jr:

    Sinatra's playing
    At Yankee Stadium tonight
    But not 'cause they won

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  3. Huzzah!

    We go on, the Yankees do not. Happiness.

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  4. "Just smile and wave goodbye my friend, it's the last laugh before I turn my head"

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  5. Alright! Already got the Saturday shift switch taken care of ... Now to schedule a full or half vacation day for Friday -- and I'll be all set.

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  6. This is going to be great. The Yankees spending all winter eating their young, their old, their infirm. And Jeter totally sucked. Can't blame ARod--the whole team was like a slow-leaking tire.

    Also can't wait till Fri. nite. The real Manny we haven't seen all year is back. We beat these guys. We've even got a better shortstop.

    On a sour note, I'll need earplugs before following those TBS tools to the Arizona desert. Caray gets more obnoxious with every game.

    But how can there be a sour note on YANKEE ELIMINATION DAY!! GOOD FUCKING RIDDANCE!!

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  7. i was gonna try a limerick, but i'm blank ;/

    nice haikus tho.

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  8. NESN's showing one of their "Walk-Off Sox" games... against the Indians.

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  9. i was gonna try a limerick, but i'm blank ;/

    There once was a team from new york!
    Their champagne, as always, is corked!
    They blew it, we knew it
    The wahoos could do it,
    Now Wang can make sweet sour pork!

    eh? eh?

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  10. Heh. Paul Byrd started this game. It was last year. Wily Mo just hit a double into the triangle.

    NESN already trying to get people geared up for the ALCS.

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  11. I am happy the yankees lost , but it is still more fun to beat them...Then watch them get beat....

    Tim nice limmerick? no class

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  12. "More to come ..."

    A winter's worth.

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  13. Johnny Damon on Joe Torre:

    "Hopefully there will be some reconsideration, but the Boss does what he wants,"

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  14. Good.

    I'm still nervous about facing the Indians...but I'm so glad the stupid hype machine is dead.

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  15. So nice to wake up to the last edition of schadenfreude for the 2007 season.

    Now, on to the ALCS! What will I do until Friday? Perhaps catch up on some idiotic TV? Read something other than baseball stuff? Get some work done? Make all those return calls to friends and family I have been avoiding? Or sit at the laptop with the JOS crew and start anticipating the games against Cleveland? Hmmm, time will tell!

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  16. hooray for Yankee elimination! It'll make for great reading, the Yanks will have to find some direction. I don't really blame Torre as much as Cashman. Will the big three really walk?

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  17. Congrats to the Cleveland Indians on playing their asses off and beating (NOT upsetting, as Chip Dumbass Carey would have you believe) the Yankees.

    Alan, I have to say that when you started this series, I worried that karma would come back and slap the Sox over the head. I'm glad to say that I was wrong. The day the Yankees exit the playoffs is always the happiest day of the baseball year for me (well, non Red Sox related, anyway). I'm tired as hell, but it was worth it to see the Indians celebrating on the field of the Stadium.

    Now to watch our guys kick their sorry asses. Go Sox!

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  18. So nice to wake up to the last edition of schadenfreude for the 2007 season.

    We shall revel in their off-season misery, too.

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  19. Reader Dan W. submits a new nickname for Slappy:

    Miss October

    "A-Rod, My god 6-55(?) in his last 16 playoff games, really? Sit it out."

    *********

    I have Alex at 9-for-61 (.098) beginning with Game 4 of the 2004 ALCS.

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  20. Suzyn Waldman is recapping Torre's press conference when she breaks down and starts crying.

    BWHAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!

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  21. ish, you gotta include that in your montage!!

    also, mike and the mad dog will be solid f-ing gold today!!!

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  22. More SoSH haiku:

    cannonball1729:
    My goodness gracious
    Of all the dramatic things
    I have ever seen

    Danny Heep:
    Wang lost two big games
    Roger retire, you fat fuck
    Jeter cries tonight

    George will fire poor Joe
    Good thing Torre has goldmine
    Deep in his nostrils

    The Boomah:
    Boss meets Joe Torre
    Boss: "Nice to see ya, Tommy!"
    Boss drools; Torre stays.

    jmcc5400:
    Sizemore rounding third ...
    Here's Damon's throw to the plate ...
    Bounce bounce bounce bounce bounce.

    Smiling Joe Hesketh:
    Two hundred million
    Flushed down the toilet again
    Must spend more next year

    educatedcheese:
    bzzz bzzz bzzz bzzz bzzz
    yummy fat Joba carcass!
    bzzz bzzz bzzz bzzz bzzz

    BANZAI!!!:
    HA HA HA HA HA
    HA HA HA HA HA HA HA
    HA HA HA YOU SUCK

    And from the 2006 Party, DLew on Roids:
    Jeter, anusface
    Jeter, Jeter, anusface
    Jeter, anusface.

    ALSO: WFAN "has been playing Suzyn crying on the air all morning."

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  23. Funny... Last night I was the biggest Cleveland fan.. in two days I'll hate them lol.

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  24. BTW, that "Next Year" jersey is classic.

    I can't wait to see what the offseason has in store for the MFY - new manager, A-Rod Watch, possible defections, etc. I hate their guts on the field, but am endlessly fascinated by them off of it.

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  25. any links to audio of suzyn waldman crying on the air?

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  26. Wow. All I can say is wow. Couldn't quite make it through the game last night...had to get my butt up out of bed at 6am - but FRICKEN AWESOME! I think Red Sox Nation should declare Oct. 8th a holiday. And the other thing, it's my birthday - what a great thing to wake up to!

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  27. ish, you gotta include that in your montage!!

    I've got it. I think John Sterling was choking up a little bit too!

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  28. Our next broadcast will be on the first Saturday next March from Legends Field in Tampa. I don't have the starting pitchers for you just yet, but I know we're going to be playing someone.

    -John Sterling, last night.

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  29. SG: The Cashman-Headwarmer Dialogues: Special ALDS Edition

    Soxaholix: "OK, kids, today's vocabulary word is Schadenfreude."

    Jere: "How great was the Jeter double play? And then the out he made in the ninth. As my girlfriend said, How come they didn't show his parents after those at bats?? ... I guess if you're a Yankee fan, you'd be "shocked" by the Indians beating you--that's what Caray kept saying. He blurted out, at one point, "this is absolutely amazing," referring to the Indians adding to their lead. Really? The team tied for the best record beating the wild card team by a few runs is "absolutely amazing"? They "shocked" Yankee fans? If they'd been shocked, they would've stayed for the whole game, instead of leaving early because they knew their team would lose. No faith, these Yankee fans. But I don't blame 'em, with the group of chokers they have to root for year after year."

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  30. SoSH has a members area in which there is a thread called "Continuing to Make Fun of NYYFans", which collects the best [sic] posts at the MFY fans message board.

    This is amusing (note the bold):

    From "justinvarnes" in The Coalition to Bring Back ARod thread:

    A-Rod,

    You've proven you can do it in NYC. You've proven you can hit again in the postseason. You've got a GREAT young pitching staff to win for and make your production even more meaningful. You've also got a young core of kids who look up to you and will help you stay loose and enjoy the game.

    You want to win a ring? Look at the talent and the resources the Yankees have. You've already shown you can get it done in the 4 slot. You know year in - year out you'll be playing in October. Ask Derek Jeter about that. Or how about Pettitte and Clemens who came back for another taste? They couldn't get enough. I doubt you could get enough either.

    And lastly, did you hear that crowd tonight? There's NOTHING like that. In ANY sport. They love you and your legs will get sore from climbing all the steps from all the curtain calls you'll get. You'll get a plague in the new stadium and be forever connected to the Greatest Team in Sports History...and YOU can sit atop that.

    Please come back. We need you and you need us!

    ********

    :>)

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  31. More haiku:

    TheBenzingerGame:
    Manny has a sign:
    "Jeter is golfing today"
    It's reusable.

    Nuf Ced posts this bit o' fun for your breakfast: Toast

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  32. I agree.

    Congratulations to the Yankees for making to the playoffs in a difficult year which saw their pitching in transition and a lot of injuries. Cleveland was clearly the better team.

    Congratulations to all those Yankee players and coaches that had a lot of good years. Now they can move along like everybody else.

    It's every team's goal to win the WS. To throw your manager under the bus by threatening him in the national media is ridiculous. If you can't be happy your team made it to the postseason, if a first round exit is such a crushing disappointment, then to that extent George and the Yanks can eat shit.

    But apart from that, well played and see ya next year.

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  33. Freakin' hilarious haikus!

    Here's my two cents:

    Schadenfreude Is Back
    See Yankees Descend To Hell
    Joy of Sox Kicks Ass

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  34. I'm still laughing at the bug haiku! bzzz bzzz bzzz bzzz bzzz

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  35. No more champagne, just pagne.

    Love it!!! The "next year" jersey is also great.

    Funny how we've been so troll-free lately.

    Or not.

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  36. I have to say that when you started this series, I worried that karma would come back and slap the Sox over the head.

    By now everyone should know that there is no such thing as karma in baseball.

    Believe in it if you choose in the larger existential sense, but when it comes to baseball, there is no hocus-pocus.

    No karma, no mystique, no magic-when-you-put-on-the-jerseys. When you gloat nothing "comes back to bite you" (if things go awry, it's not because you gloated).

    No lucky shorts, no words you can't say, no angering baseball gods that don't exist, no special skinny pens. (Sorry, Allan.)

    There are just the games, the players, the managers. What we do doesn't effect one single thing on the field.

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  37. You know, earlier this season, when the Sox had a huge lead, some of us were openly gleeful.

    Other JoS commenters told us gleeful ones that we should be more subdued - because if we were too happy, bad things would happen to the Sox, and we would all be humiliated.

    Personally, I am so happy that I enjoyed every single minute of this amazing season to the fullest extent I could.

    If it hadn't gone our way - if we had blown the division or lost the DS - every fan would have been hurting, the ones who were thrilled and believed all along, and the ones who held their breath waiting for The Bad Thing to happen.

    Nothing can change the outcome, but I for one am glad I believed in this team every second of every day.

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  38. You'll get a plague in the new stadium

    OMG!!!!!!! THIS IS MY FAVOURITE TYPO EVER!!!

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  39. Woti: great comment.

    Zenslinger said:
    It's every team's goal to win the WS. To throw your manager under the bus by threatening him in the national media is ridiculous. If you can't be happy your team made it to the postseason, if a first round exit is such a crushing disappointment, then to that extent George and the Yanks can eat shit.

    This is exactly right. Right there, that's a huge part of what drove me away from them.

    It's why I react so strongly when Red Sox fans act that way. Save that shit for the Yankees.

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  40. Reader Dan W. submits a new nickname for Slappy:

    Miss October


    I thought sexism was unwelcome here.

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  41. My favourite haikus here:

    Manny has a sign:
    "Jeter is golfing today"
    It's reusable.


    and

    Schadenfreude Is Back
    See Yankees Descend To Hell
    Joy of Sox Kicks Ass

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  42. Unlucky thirteen
    A-Rod nine for sixty-one
    Invisible Man

    ****

    There once was a man named Torre
    Who again in October says "Sorry"
    "We just couldn't do it"
    So George says "Just screw it"
    and throws Joe under a lorry.

    ****
    Happy YED everyone!

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  43. It's why I react so strongly when Red Sox fans act that way. Save that shit for the Yankees.

    And they do sometimes. It's very disturbing.

    I fllirted with the idea that the Steinbrenner threat was a media ploy, and that they were winking at each other about it. But the obvious emotion there for Torre and other belies that.

    It's not that the Yanks don't need a shakeup in the form of a new manager. It's just so absurd to call out an employee who has been so successful for 12 years, and then fire him -- not because they need a change, but because he could only field the third- or fourth-best team in baseball.

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  44. hi redsock
    thought you would appreciat this:
    http://www.nytimes.com/2007/10/09/sports/baseball/09sandomir.html?ref=sports

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  45. Terry Francona just announced the pitching rotation for the ALCS. Of course, I missed it, so I'll wait for the update on the Globe.

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  46. Here we go.

    Game 1: Beckett vs. Sabathia
    Game 2: Schilling vs. Carmona
    Game 3: Matsuzaka vs. Westbrook

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  47. Extra Bases is saying Schilling in game 2. I think that's the thing to do.

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  48. By now everyone should know that there is no such thing as karma in baseball.

    Believe in it if you choose in the larger existential sense, but when it comes to baseball, there is no hocus-pocus.

    No karma, no mystique, no magic-when-you-put-on-the-jerseys. When you gloat nothing "comes back to bite you" (if things go awry, it's not because you gloated).

    No lucky shorts, no words you can't say, no angering baseball gods that don't exist, no special skinny pens. (Sorry, Allan.)

    There are just the games, the players, the managers. What we do doesn't effect one single thing on the field.


    You're right, Laura. I guess there's still a little of the pre-2004 Red Sox fan still in me. Well, the Yankees are gone, so hey - lesson learned. ;)

    Listening to Mike & the Mad Dog on WFAN - they are ripping apart the Yankees, taking shots at Jeter, Wang, the front office, everybody. It is glorious beyond words.

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  49. I didn't realize until I was skimming the largely idiotic comments on Foxsports.com's "A-Rod Fails to Shine" that the Indians beat the Evil Empire on Indigenous Peoples' Day / Columbus Day. What a blow to colonialism.

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  50. Somewhere I have the mp3 file of M&MD the day after the Red Sox won the 2004 pennant. Nothing will top that, but I'll bet today is pretty enjoyable.

    no special skinny pens. (Sorry, Allan.)

    Micron Mojo cannot be stopped!

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  51. "Count the rings, baby!"
    Go back to two thousand one
    It's a big fat zero.

    Blame A-Rod for tank
    Why did he not pitch at all
    Selfish -- no calm eyes

    Torre - get out now
    Sit home -- watch Yanks finish third
    Boss wants more pudding

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  52. Somewhere I have the mp3 file of M&MD the day after the Red Sox won the 2004 pennant. Nothing will top that, but I'll bet today is pretty enjoyable.

    I still remember that show - I found it in the fervor of looking for Red Sox stuff after Game 7 (hearing Jon Miller's calls of the Damon GS and the end of the game were tremendous - that he has to do radio while Joe Buck does TV is a legit crime). You're not lying - that first break was incredible. I think Mike wanted to cry, and Mad Dog sounded like a kid who got everything he wanted for Christmas. If you could find it, I'd love to hear it again.

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  53. Jeter flops in clutch
    3 G I D P
    Where did the ghosts go?

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  54. the Indians beat the Evil Empire on Indigenous Peoples' Day / Columbus Day.

    Extra wonderful :)

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  55. I guess there's still a little of the pre-2004 Red Sox fan still in me. Well, the Yankees are gone, so hey - lesson learned. ;)

    Tony, that's brilliant. Now don't forget it!! ;-)

    Also, my comments weren't directed only at you. There was plenty of hand-wringing and storm-warnings all season. It was a running JoS theme - the gloom-and-doomers vs the relax-and-enjoys.

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  56. There once was a man named Torre
    Who again in October says "Sorry"
    "We just couldn't do it"
    So George says "Just screw it"
    and throws Joe under a lorry.


    I am very partial to limericks. This ones's great.

    It's not that the Yanks don't need a shakeup in the form of a new manager. It's just so absurd to call out an employee who has been so successful for 12 years, and then fire him -- not because they need a change, but because he could only field the third- or fourth-best team in baseball.

    Essackly.

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  57. MORE!

    No Pepper
    Jeter's fall training
    Working on range to his left
    Stretch for the remote

    86spike
    Paul Byrd resists porn
    No porn seems to makes you clutch
    Jeter must loooooooove porn

    bugs like to eat shit
    bugs like to eat Joba, too
    Joba: piece of shit

    Crying in baseball?
    Suzyn can't help but break rule
    each tear gives me wood.

    Penis-shaped nose Joe
    Can start a freakshow career
    Pissing out his schnozz

    Mattingly's parents
    were brother/sister, know why?
    Don's inbred long neck

    OilCanShotTupac
    Bottom of the 6th
    Jeter bids to bring Yanks back
    4-6-3 DP

    Nuf Ced
    Has-been Free Agents
    Yanks elimination means
    Big Payday coming

    Time off this autumn
    Posada can go shopping
    Needs to buy a chin

    Empyreal
    Home run in seventh
    A-Rod texts Boras quickly:
    "Now clutch in playoffs"

    Wade Boggs Hair
    Once measured in rings,
    first round playoff exits now
    define True Yankees.

    Maalox
    Hours after their
    Joyous humiliation,
    I am still erect.

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  58. OilCanShotTupac

    Hey Johnny Damon
    Shorter hair and more money
    Is losing any fun?

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  59. No Pepper

    Jeter's fall training
    Working on range to his left
    Stretch for the remote

    Nuf Ced

    Time off this autumn
    Posada can go shopping
    Needs to buy a chin


    These are my faves because they have the proper seasonal reference. But I loved the lorry limerick as well.

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  60. I love it when the Extra Bases entries on Boston.com sometimes have unique typos.
    The yankees entry today spelled them as 'yabkees'. I think they have since corrected it .
    Once they spelled Clemens, as Clemons. I immediately pictured a "lemon throwing" Rah-ger !

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  61. Jeter's fall training
    Working on range to his left
    Stretch for the remote


    This is quite brilliant.

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  62. It amazes me just how creative and poetic all you haiku and limerick writers are. Thanks for sharing. I haven't read this much poetry in quite a while! It would be great to collect and place them all in one link on JOS to review when we are feeling discouraged perhaps in some future season or just need a good laugh!

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  63. With all due respect to Dan W., they've been selling shirts in Kenmore Square for years that say "A-Rod: Mr. April/Miss October." And I always thought it was brilliant because it has the meaning of: "he's great in the beginning, but he misses out on the ring at the end. "Miss" is a verb."

    And I swear I was going to write that anyway, but as I scrolled through, I did see L-Girl's thing about sexism. Which I'm totally glad she did, because that's what I thought at first, until I realized the other meaning. (Don't get me wrong, I'm sure some people wear that shirt thinking it means "he's female, and that's bad," but the way I think of it, it's not sexist, just hilarious.)

    Thanks for the link, Allan.

    Also, "no more champagne, just pagne"-- And no more champions, just pions.

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  64. The first page of John Rolfe's blog does a good (and funny) job of summing up the Madness of King George vis a vis Joe Torre. I've never read this guy before but this is pretty nice.

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  65. Just found out game 2 is a real possibilty for me, If anyone from Joy Nation will be there maybe a beverage is in order......

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  66. To the tune of New York, New York (aka the Yankees stadium post win theme song):

    Start spreading the news
    The Yankees are done
    A-Rod struck out again & again
    New York, New York

    200 Million Bucks
    Can't buy them a hit
    Hey Derek, Johnny, Jason, Bobby
    you're swinging like shit

    If you want to wake up in a city that's playing ball
    make sure the guy on the hill, isn't asleep.
    Joe Torre's news
    he's going away
    They'll make a brand new start of it
    in old New York

    If they can't make it now
    Steinbrenner's gonna lose it somehow
    And so goodbye New York, New York

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