November 13, 2009

Secret Source Of Yankees Cash Flow Revealed

Now we know how the Yankees have been able to spend so much money:
New York Yankees team ownership revealed Tuesday that the phrase "Yankees suck," one of the most popular chants in sports, was trademarked by the 27-time World Series champions prior to the 1996 season, a business strategy that has earned the team close to $100 billion over the past 13 years.

U.S. Patent and Trademark Office records show that every time an individual chants, shouts, or writes the words "Yankees suck," the New York Yankees organization earns at least $2.15 ...

Furthermore, financial records indicate that by also owning the rights to the common anti-Yankee epithet "Jeter blows," the team earned much of the money needed to sign Alex Rodriguez in 2004. ...

General Manager Brian Cashman told reporters that baseball fans who muttered "Yankees suck" to themselves while on the grounds of major-league ballparks during the second half of the 2007 season alone essentially funded the team's new $1.2 billion stadium.

The organization also has reason to be optimistic about the future of "Yankees suck" revenue: Accountants project that, as the Internet and cable television bring the team into millions more homes across the globe, there could soon come a time when the Yankees are told they suck three times a second on every continent.

10 comments:

richard said...

Link to a "primary source", please ;-)

redsock said...

It's there!

tim said...

Tricky prick.

tim said...

I dunno if its GOOD or BAD that I was gullible there...I wouldn't put it past the fuckers.

L-girl said...

I had to look at the source code to find the link!

truly good design said...

LOL i just noticed the red period.

http://www.sportspickle.com/article:378/derek-jeter-wins-american-league-cy-young-award

fla beck said...

Longtime lurker,SG regular-F*&$ing Hilarious!

Amy said...

I got a good chuckle out of this. I should save it to share with my class the next time I teach Trademark Law (spring 2011).

Ish said...

I am not gullible. :>)

FenFan said...

Marketing genius! LOL