February 26, 2012

9 Things That Will Happen In 2012

A little bit of fun, somewhere between a wish list and serious prognostication:

9 Things That Will Happen In 2012

1 - Adrian Gonzalez will hit three home runs in a game.

2 - A Red Sox pitcher will strike out the side on 9 pitches.

3 - Boston will score 20+ runs in a game.

4 - The Yankees will be no-hit.

5 - Daisuke Matsuzaka will be the team's best pitcher in September and give a revelatory performance in October.

6 - A Red Sox player not named Jacoby Ellsbury will hit an inside-the-park home run.

7 - Joe Girardi will be fired as Yankees manager after CC Sabathia and Joba Chamberlain are caught mid-game wolfing down Nutty Buddies and Ring Dings in the clubhouse.

8 - There will be at least four games in which we do not curse the presence of Nick Punto.

9 - The Red Sox will win the 2012 World Series - clinching Game 6 at Fenway Park!

What are your 9?

36 comments:

laura k said...

Excellent list!!!

There will be at least four games in which we do not curse the presence of Nick Punto.

Let the counting begin!

9casey said...

If Nick Punto is our biggest problem , II will take it..

allan said...

Other people are supposed to add their list o' 9.....

johngoldfine said...

Allan, #5! Puh-leeeze! G'wan, pull the other one!

laura k said...

Other people are supposed to add their list o' 9.....

You might want to say that in the post.

allan said...

Let the counting begin!

Let's hope all 4 are not in March.

Jere said...

I will go Palin and react to your 9:

1. I'm gonna say no, but that he does have a game with 4 doubles. In July.

2. Fastest K-side: 11 pitches. Early August.

3. Yes, twice. June and July.

4. Yes, and it will be a perfect game. In May.

5. Well, I'm at the pont where I predict Dice wins the Cy Young every year, still hoping he does what he once did again. So, sure.

6. Hmmm. I'll say yes but that it only happens because of a crazy bounce or something. In the Nats series.

7. No. Ho Hos and meth.

8. Iglesias wins the job in ST and Punto hardly plays.

9. Yes. The score will be 7-1.

scabtheverse said...

9) Adrian Gonzalez will dress up at Ernie defying logic and good grace

8) John Lackey will eat three hot dogs at the post game spread instead of six

7) Tito will return to the clubhouse with a Coors Light and poor it on Bobby V's head (Tim McCarver will arrive and say "you're a real man, Deion!")

6) David Ortiz with shave off his eyebrows like Uncle Leo in Seinfeld post-explosion

5) Jacoby Ellsbury will change his name to Jacob Y. Ellsbury

4) John Henry will honor other people with two first names on a special day (promotional giveaway: Ron Paul stickers)

3) Dice-K will start a new trend called "Dicing" (like "Tebowing" but different).

2) Jason Varitek and Kevin You-Ko-Lus will exchange facial hair.

1) The Boston Red Sox will participate in the 2012 baseball season in a triumphant return to spring

allan said...

I thought of Ho Hos but went with Ring Dings for alliteration purposes. ... (Though CC and Ho Ho could work, I suppose.)

GK said...

Daisuke will be hear some choice words in his native language from the skipper, when he is driving everyone nuts with his walks. Maybe, just maybe, that will make throw a strike.

Your said...

How about the Yankees will DH 6 players leaving only CC, Martin, Cano and Granderson to cover the field.

9casey said...

10, sox ink LBJ to 6 year deal.

I can only hope becuase if he reaches free agency he is all but gone.

Amy said...

1. Beckett and Valentine will come to blows, or close to it. Or Youkilis and Valentine.

2. The Red Sox will get someone to play shortstop who will not be on the team after 2012.

3. Crawford will improve but Gonzalez will get worse.

4. I will complain regularly about missing Tek and Wakefield.

5. Allan and Laura will ban all talk of the 2012 election.

6. Who is Nick Punto?

7. It will snow heavily on opening day---after a winter with almost no snow.

8. Youkilis will be back in form, as will Buchholz, but someone else (Ortiz? Pedroia?) will suffer an injury that puts them on the DL for a good part of the season.

9. We will nevertheless be playing baseball in October.

Boy, that's not a terribly happy looking list, but...time will tell.

laura k said...

9 Things That Will Happen on a Joy of Sox Gamethread in 2012

1. We will hate another player as much as we hated John Lackey in 2011

2. We will say "Jonathan who?" or "Bot who?"

3. Many people will be annoyed or bored as I complain about advertising and/or politics in the game

4. Amy will ask who someone is, in all caps

5. Maxwell Horse will complain about digital images

6. We will learn where Westcoast Sox is going

7. We will learn what Kat's husband thinks

8. We will learn what Tim is cooking for dinner

9. Jere will discover a new obsession

and the 10th inning:

10. We will celebrate together in October.

laura k said...

5. Allan and Laura will ban all talk of the 2012 election.

Done!

6. Who is Nick Punto?

We were typing at the same time! :)

laura k said...

4) John Henry will honor other people with two first names on a special day (promotional giveaway: Ron Paul stickers)

This is very funny. We'll have to do a two-first-name team. Babe Ruth, Pete Rose...

SoSock said...

Hank Aaron, Tommy John, Mike Lowell,
On your list Laura - I hope #1 happens rarely and #2 often...

laura k said...

On your list Laura - I hope #1 happens rarely and #2 often...

You were on the first draft, SoSock: We will learn about SoSock's love life or his Little League team, whichever is doing better. :)

Jackie Robinson, Cliff Lee

allan said...

I don't see much humour in Amy's list.

We will hate another player as much as we hated John Lackey in 2011

I have my doubts.

Beckett and Valentine will come to blows, or close to it. Or Youkilis and Valentine.

FUN! Better be during a game.

allan said...

More Sure Things

I will moan about how the game thread board is not perfect.

NESN will miss pitches, including an opposing team dong, and I will complain. With naughty words.

Don will not have broken his addiction to reading press notes verbatim.

Ig said...

MVP for the all time TWO FIRST NAME team:
Henry Aaron

Still, ahead of the Babe.

And Ted Williams, oh so close, but not making the final cut.

(This thread could lead a lot of different directions.)

laura k said...

Still, ahead of the Babe.

I'm a huge fan of Hank Aaron, but if you think he's ahead of the Babe, you should learn more about said Babe.

allan said...

Henry Aaron vs George Ruth?
It's a tie.

Like Ted Williams, Robin Roberts is also close.

Also:
The Dean brothers: Paul and Jay.
David Jonathan Drew
Pete Rose
Joe Morgan
Bill James (Deadball Era pitcher)

Ig said...

Henry Louis Aaron vs. George Herman Ruth?
Three first names each? Yeah, I'm proud to call it a tie.

laura k said...

Henry Aaron vs George Ruth?
It's a tie.


I was talking about baseball, not names!

laura k said...

Hey, I said Pete Rose earlier. We recently heard not to trust a man with three first names.

Amy said...

Allan, I admit my list wasn't funny. Except for

WHO IS NICK PUNTO?

:)

I would add to Laura's:

Jere will go to more games than all the rest of us combined and tell us all how easy it is to get tickets.

Tim will cook some amazing meals while watching games.

SoSock will take a lot of showers after a lot of Little League games.

Kathryn's son will solve all our tech problems.

JohnGoldsmith will, like me, take us down lots of detours.

9casey will get pissed off at me for something, but will also be the only one who agrees with me on something.

Zen will be at The Bar, wherever that is.

And maybe Rob will return from hockey land more often this season.

Can't wait for it all to begin again!! I miss you all!

scabtheverse said...

The origin of the Punto curse...

Back in junior college: playoff game: on the road. I was ejected from the final regular season game -so by rule I have to sit out the next game. Our Skipper had been ejected twice during the season so he'd been banned from the dugout.

As a mildly grumpy (read: hostile) 70-year-old ex-Yankee farmhand, Skip didn't like being told what to do. He had been sitting in the stands for other games, which was fine. We'd hear his curses from the dugout, nonetheless. This was the playoffs, however, so Skip got himself a lawnchair and placed it in foul territory right outside the dugout. The umpires and other coaches were terrified of him so no one said anything. He even had a player serve as a gopher to give instructions to the interim coach (who was also terrified of him).

To give you an idea of Skip, he once got bit by a rattlesnake during practice. He then waited for practice to end to go to the hospital. He also recalled when the minor leagues went from soft hats to hard helmets in the batter's box. The words "sissy" and/or "queer" strike my memory as I recall his description.

Anyway, the game: we were up something like 11-1. Cruising into the late innings. Our first baseman had already hit three homeruns. Then the wheels slowly started to come off. The rest is hazy. I just remember that the score was like 11-11 and our first baseman crushed another one. We were pumped! Going crazy in the dugout... and the centerfielder reaches over the fence and pulls it back. Wind out of sails. I think they won 13-12.

Their shortstop had a bunch of hits and RBIs. Some dude named Nick Punto.

johngoldfine said...

Hey Amy, that JohnGoldsmith guy never saw a detour he didn't want to take--if he's the same JohnGoldsmith you're thinking of....

Amy said...

Oops, sorry, John! (I actually know a Jon Goldsmith, so it wasn't a complete senior moment, but yeah, it was a partial one!)

Fine > smith. :)

laura k said...

Everything on Amy's second list will happen. Bring it on!

laura k said...

Some dude named Nick Punto.

*shudder*

Good thing there are no such thing as curses!

accudart said...

1. Aviles hits .290 with .340 OBP and chips in 12 HR.

2. Lavanway after his call-up and Saltalamacchia combine to hit 35 dinners.

3. Carl Crawford steals 40 bases and gets his OBP over .330 and becomes a Fenway fav as he tames the Green Monster.

4. Beckett gets a $50,000 fine when his Vitamin water is found to be laced with rum in his attempt to overcome the beer ban.

5. Cody Ross hits .260 with 20 hr's in 400 PA.

6. Bard wins 13 games with an era of 3.73 and fans say Lackey who??

7. Vanentine calls out the players after a five game skid during a west coast swing. The Boston press goes into overdrive with glee. the Sox then go 10-2 to take back first from the Yankees for good. The Boston press is sad.

8. Middlebrook impresses after being called up when the rosters are expanded. Fans wonder if Youk be moved to DH for 2013 and Ortiz not resigned.

9. Veritek and Wakefield throw out the first pitch for game 7 of ALCS against the Yankees. Ortiz hits a 2-2 pitch with two outs and a runner on on first to the second deck in rf off Mo and the Sox win the pennant 6-5. The Sox go on to sweep the Marlins in the World Series....Bobby Valentie weeps.

allan said...

2. Lavanway after his call-up and Saltalamacchia combine to hit 35 dinners.

1. Not fried chicken, I hope.

2. Saving the team $$ on meal money.

3. Now that's delivering at the plate.

etc. etc. etc.

allan said...

But seriously, folks, I'll sign up for the dart's season right here and now.

***

Also, my BP 2012 arrived today! Woo-hoo!

accudart said...

I need an Editor and maybe some spell check...........


Received my BP Sat.